1 Corinthians 16:13
In her book, The Feminization of American Culture, Ann Douglas describes how the men in our nation have been “emasculated.” How true and how sad. Men – including Christian men, have neglected to guard this most important of posts – and even the women in this country are noticing (and writing about it). I’m not sure how many men will actually read Douglas’ book – nor care that this is true of them, but they should. This is most especially the case for those who claim to be Christian men. Why do I say that? Because God does not see our masculinity as something optional. Paul’s words “act like men” in (1 Co 16:13) are given in the imperative. We MUST “act like men”. This then is what God expects: men who are known as such not simply because that is their gender, but also their behavior. They are men behaving (or “acting”) in a manly way. Fathers with sons take note. Single mothers with sons take note also. God doesn’t change the rules nor give exception to anyone –even those coming from broken homes. So serious is this particular command that eight chapters prior in the same letter, Paul warns that those who are “effeminate” (the opposite of masculine behavior) will “not inherit the kingdom of God” (1Co 6:9). In other words, men who fail to be masculine will go to Hell. Heaven has no place for such individuals – “Christian” or otherwise. Which brings me to the focus of my post. I have put together a list of those attitudes and behaviors that I believe are essential to fulfilling Paul’s “manly” command. I have done this not only because of what we just discussed, but because there also seems to be a great deal of ignorance associated with this subject. Though men may know (and even be desirous of carrying out) Paul’s command, they are (at the same time) unsure what such masculine behavior looks like – at least in biblical and practical terms. This list accomplishes both. Though I have not taken the time to provide such support, it is robustly biblical. It is also relevant –speaking in a modern way to the modern obstacles of masculinity. Finally, it is meant to challenge your thinking on the subject (especially #5). With that in mind, please consider:
How God Defines Masculinity (i.e. The attributes of a man who acts “like a man”)
He…
- Is courageous in the face of opposition
- Is unmoved by emotions or emotional reasoning
- Is diligent to discipline and disciple both his wife and kids
- Protects his wife and kids, but never covers for his wife and kids
- Is intolerant of any disrespect shown by his wife or kids
- Realizes that his wife was created for him, his preferences, aspirations, lifestyle and agenda – and not the other way around
- Is immune to manipulation or whining
- Is completely righteous and fair in all his judgments
- Learns from criticism and suggestions
- Listens intently when others are talking to him
- Knows how to say “no” – and does so, often
- Sees to it that there is peace in his home by not allowing for things/people that create chaos
- Is not afraid to raise his voice (i.e. yell) when those in the home are not listening
- Never resorts to lies, manipulation or name-calling when fighting – especially with his wife
- Is able to draw a line in the sand and hold it
- Understands the difference between exasperation and the intolerance of sin
- Lives for an audience of One
- Leads by his conviction and never the conviction of others
- Responds in kind (which is not the same as, “responds in kindness”)
- Hates Facebook and thinks they should change their name to “IAmInsecureAndInLoveWithMyself.com”
- Cares very little if others approve of him as long as he has Christ’s approval
- Despises cowards and cowardliness, posers and laziness
- Refuses to cave into fear
- Is committed to the truth no matter the cost
- Seeks justice and to see justice served
- Views God’s Laws as is his delight and counselors
- Refuses to hang out with/listen to fools, scoffers and pagans
- Will sacrifice nothing to see that his life counts for Christ
- Is not afraid to speak up for Christ and God’s Word
- Would rather be brutally whipped than be called “p****- whipped”
- Keeps his word even when it hurts
- Is calm but carries a big stick
- Pulls the trigger, always
- Will confront his Christian friends when they are in sin
- Is appalled at the thought of speaking with a lisp, getting highlights, wearing pink, getting flowers, letting his wife dress him, wearing his wife’s clothes or letting his wife defend him
- Will die before he sees his son (or dog) dressed in a tutu, playing with Barbie dolls or watching “Frozen”
- Admits when he is wrong and moves on
- Rights his wrongs, doesn’t excuse his sin, blame it on others or attempt to hide it
- Makes sure his wife and kids are righting their wrongs, not excusing their sin, blaming it on others or attempting to hide it
- Has never heard the statement, “She wears the pants” when others are describing his relationship with his wife.
- Knows that he was created for Christ and therefore makes all decisions – big or small, based on what is acceptable and pleasing to Him
- Is not ashamed of His God, His Word and His gospel or to share them with others
- Is loyal to Christ and His Church over anyone including his family.